Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Rap Star

So the other day I'm searching through some old scripts on my computer and I spot a file called "rap." Immediately I flashed back to the nineties and remembered my secret dream. Well besides the one where I have a three-way with 1978's Erin Grey and 1980's Phoebe Cates.

I'm talking about the dream where, just like so many Jewish white guys before me, I wanted to be a rap star.

So here is the unedited rap I wrote sometime last decade. My favorite line has to be the "Like a fresh kid, Wearing a bib." Pure gold.

If anyone has a connection to Eminem, maybe shoot him this link. I'm still available.

Lyrics by Noah Ruderman

Don’t have it all
Never needed it
Cause I can always quit
If I want
Maybe flaunt
My mind
My heart
Never slow, dough
Keeps rollin
Never holdin
Me down
Never round
Or wide
I’ll never hide
The way
The rule
Never caught being a fool
Because that’s the easy way
To die
Or cry
Never lie, cause my
high ain’t warranted
Like a fresh kid
Wearing a bib
On a chair
I stare, bare
In my lair
Don’t need that mess
I confess
Don’t clean up my mess
Cause when I’m done
Having fun, I’m gonna run
I'm gonna scream
Shouts of rage
Rip a page
Don’t need no wage
Or any boss
Never at a loss, or floss
So maybe I’ll crash
Or won’t last,
Maybe going too fast
Forgetting the past, cause it has
To repeat itself
Live a life of wealth
And choice
My voice is hoarse, never get a divorce
Cause I’ll stick, never stray
Never run away
And I’ll say
Hey, hey, hey

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